This is the gum wall in Post Alley, Seattle. Here lies a memory; a great one. My piece of gum is there, from a night I’ll never forget. What’s bigger than the actual memory is what could have been, but never happened. Sometimes we need to appreciate the things that never came to be.
Sometimes…
- You miss someone so much but you can’t put a finger on who it is you miss
- The little itty-bitty things are what you miss; a saying, like “they look like fish” only makes you laugh
- You choose not to remember because you miss it too much
- Someone can just hold your hand for a second, and it seems like everything is okay
- You wonder “how the hell did the night end like this?”
- It’s when you’re mad at each other, but yet write little notes back and forth because you can’t help but share your thoughts
- It’s what could have been, but you never told me, and now it’s too late
- You wonder if the person meant for you just walked by you, but you were too occupied with something else
- It’s a numbness that makes you happy/sad, but you can’t describe it. More-often-than-not, it’s this.
I know this post might sound emo, but it’s not intended to be. My cat woke me up so here I am, just thinking. This is about nobody in particular, but everyone in general.
Take a moment and think about your memories, of what actually happened, but also what could have happened; not to wish things were different, but just to ponder. It may sadden you, but it will also bring a smile to your face.
Here’s to remembering lost memories and cherishing the things that never happened.
New York…I can’t believe I haven’t been. This needs to change, soon—preferably before April 28.
What’s so special about that date? That’s the last day of the Tim Burton Exhibit at the Museum of Modern Art. Besides making art, I can’t think of anything else more exhilarating than traveling to see artwork, especially a huge inspiration like Burton. That was why I went to Italy and France in 2005. I was spoiled with Bernini, Giotto and Neo-Classical paintings.
Really, is there anything better? Traveling and looking at art? Maybe I’m a hopeless romantic, but I seriously can’t ponder a better time. My BFFF recently suggested the movie “Before Sunrise” to me, and I really enjoyed it.
Something about doing something because you love to: no agenda, no explanation, just doing it.
On a personal note, I’d love to go to NYC in honor of my friend whom I lost this past year. He was a huge Yankees fan, and it’d be a great way to honor him by going to see Yankee Stadium and watching them play.
Maybe when I return from Asia in March, I should spend a few days in New York City.
The question I ask myself…why not?
Happy birthday to my friend Adam—aka @raid5! I’m going to keep his age secret for his sake, but we’re both getting old. Adam and I have been friends since sixth grade, and still going strong! It’s amazing when you consider most people lose contact with their friends in high school.
We played football and basketball together up until high school, but one thing we always shared was our love for many of the following:
- Sports
- Jones soda
- Seafood
- Coffee
- Vino
But the most important thing…computers. We were both computer geeks growing up; from playing Command and Conquer: Red Alert to chatting it up on ICQ. Adam was always a huge inspiration for me in developing my skills, and encouraged me to learn coding. At the time, I was really resistant to it and just wanted to design. Thank goodness I listened to his advice. If I didn’t, I probably wouldn’t have the awesome job I do now. I’m not sharing my paycheck with you though, Adam!
He’s probably my number one fan, traveling to every art show I’ve had…except the ones I had in California, but I can understand. He’s a great travel buddy and we’ve gone to San Diego to see our friend Zac and the 140 Twitter Conference in Los Angeles. I think both our dreams were fulfilled when we got to meet ijustine!
Check out the project he’s been constantly working on: mapwith.us.
So happy birthday, my friend! Here’s to many years of traveling and coding together 
Is it me? I’ve been asking myself in the last few hours. I wonder if I scare people away.
I’m not a dreamer, but dream catcher; one of those hopeless romantics that feel like anything is possible. Maybe I get it from my friend Veronica—the belief that moving mountings is a mere act, rather than impossibility. But does everyone feel that way?
If I say I will do something, I will do whatever it takes to reach that goal. I wonder if that scares people or adds pressure on them? Is there such a thing as being too motivated? George Carlin said that it’s the motivated people you have to look out for.
My brother and I grew up with X-Men comics, and he said that I have a gift of being focused on my ambitious and loving…almost too much. Is that a fault? Sometimes I do feel like a mutant, and just want to be accepted by others. Just because I have huge expectations of myself doesn’t mean I have the same in other people—mean that as a good thing. I love people as they are.
In May of 2009, when Veronica told me about her brother #Eric’s illness, I did not think twice and decided to drop everything to do whatever it takes to help her save her brother. Upon further reflection, this might not be a normal reaction for people. Is it scary that my initial reaction was to help unconditionally without thinking of the circumstances and “improbabilities” for someone I’ve never met? For me…no, absolutely not.
So what’s my point? I supposed I’m curious if I add too much pressure on people. Am I isolating myself from the world? Am I delusional?
I’d love to hear your thoughts and could use some advice.
Meanwhile, I’ve been looking at LOL Cats to lift my spirits. Even when I’m feeling this down, there’s no better cure than an I Can Has Cheezburger cat.
see more Lolcats and funny pictures
You might be wondering if I’m selling all of my possessions. The answer is “maybe.” I’m no longer going to buy DVDs and have an electronic library. If you’re interested in any of these, email me.
If you want me to ship, we can arrange accordingly. Cash or PayPal only please.
Movie/Price
12 Monkeys $8
300! (Special Edition) $15
Alice in Chains: Unplugged $10
Alien (Triple Pack) $15
Any Given Sunday $8
Batman Begins $10
Ben Hur $5
Beverly Hills Cop 2 $5
Black Hawk Down: Deluxe Set $20
Boondock Saints $8
Braveheart $10
Bruce Lee 5 Disc Set $30
Casino Royale $10
Chappelle Show $10
Clear and Present Danger $5
Collateral (Special Edition) $15
Commando $8
Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon $8
Frida $8
Girl, Interrupted $5
Gladiator (Extended Edition) $20
Home Alone $5
Hot Shots: Part Deux $5
Hotel Rwanda $8
I, Robot $8
Kill Bill Vol. 1 $8
Kill Bill Vol. 2 $8
Legends of the Fall $8
Lost Souls $5
Madagascar $8
March of the Penguins $5
Miami Vice: Director’s Edition $10
Munich $8
Pollock $8
Pulp Fiction $10
Requiem For a Dream $8
Reservoir Dogs $10
Rudy $5
Scareface: 2-Disc Anniversary $15
Se7en $8
Shark Week 20th Anniversary Collection $15
Speed $5
Spy Game $8
Terminator 2: Judgment Day (Extreme Edition) $15
The Departed (Special Edition) $15
The Godfather $8
The Simpsons Movie $8
Thomas Crown Affair $5
Transformers $8
We Were Soldiers $8
